


Trial and Error

by Purpledragon6



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Adam is a dick to children, Family Fluff, Gen, Slow Burn, Space Dad Shiro (Voltron), the siblings of the missing search for their own answers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-23
Updated: 2018-10-20
Packaged: 2019-06-15 05:37:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15406155
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Purpledragon6/pseuds/Purpledragon6
Summary: When Adam first learned about Shiro's 'death', it was safe to say that he was devastated- until two children began to ask their own questions. While lies begin to unravel and truths bubble to the surface, Adam tries to keep himself together for the sake of both himself and a mysterious newcomer who has ties to his missing ex.





	1. Chapter 1

In life, things were meant to go wrong.

Mistakes were to be learned from.

Everyone received a second chance-

Except at the Garrison. When you were up in space, there was no room for mistakes. One wrong turn could cost you your life- and one poorly chosen pilot could lead to the tragic death of two other innocent individuals. One of whom was a father and the other just a child with his whole life ahead of him!

“Damn it, Takashi…” Adam hissed between gritted teeth, his hand shaking around the handle of his coffee mug.

He felt sick, confused- angry even. The cooled coffee was sitting like a brick in the pit of his stomach and he was almost sure it was going to erupt up his throat at any given moment.

But it didn’t. It just sat there, mulling as he did. Refusing to move even if it meant sacrificing comfort.

“Damn it… Why would they let him fly- in his condition!?”

The TV was clicked off and the remote was thrown to a place unknown. Its clatter against whatever surface it had hit was barely enough to get Adam's attention away from his racing thoughts. He thought he just needed some quiet, to be away from the noise of the TV in order to feel sane again, but the silence in the room was enough to drive a man to near insanity. The only thing keeping Adam from that insanity was the sound of his own labored breathing as he desperately fought back tears.

Who those tears were truly being shed for was beyond him. He didn't know if they were for his ex-fiance, the father of the children he had watched grow up, the son who would never know what the rest of his life had in store for him- the mother and daughter left behind on Earth. Or- or maybe himself for getting too attached and only cutting things off when he was too far gone-.

“You did it again, Adam… Even after you said you wouldn’t- You told Takashi you wouldn’t-”

Adam finally felt a tear pool at the inner corner of his eye. The first and possibly only one that he would allow to fall. It made him want to think harder on who he was going to let it fall for- pick one of the 6 people he had listed in his mind and be done with it. Knock

Any and all tears that may have fallen were dried up in an instance as Adam jumped. He wasn’t expecting any visitors, so the sudden interruption made him feel on edge… For whatever reason. It wasn’t like he had any reason to be vary of someone at the Garrison, right?

So with a quick throat clear and an adjustment of his uniform, he answered the door. “Hello-”

“The Garrison is lying about my brother.” Adam was taken aback by the snap in Katie’s voice.

If not for her long hair, he would have instantly mistaken her for her late brother, Matthew Holt. Her frown and determined eyes almost matched his from when it was first announced Shiro wouldn’t be able to take on the mission…

It was also the same face Keith Kogane wore when Adam first came to tell him about the crash. As the families of the deceased were told before the newscasting was made the boy narrowly made it on their call list as Shiro’s “brother”. Just like Katie- Keith was in disbelief as well.

“Adam! Takashi was an ace pilot! Theres just no way-” Katie’s eyes darkened with tears. “You don’t believe this, do you?”

When Keith made that same argument earlier, it made Adam think…He’d be lying if he said he hadn’t thought of it…But the rational side of his brain reminded him of his love’s condition. It reminded him of how irresponsible it was that the Garrison let him pilot anyhow, and how they still changed their minds in Shiro's favor even with an inexperienced CHILD going on the mission as his first one! It all seemed like a recipe for absolute disaster, which was surprising of a Garrison that prided itself in being orderly and on-top of things.

"Takashi was sick, Katie." Adam replied finally. "The Garrison told him he wouldn't be able to pilot and he did it anyway despite it... He brought this on himself."

"Takashi had YEARS before his sickness effected him too horribly! It didn't change the fact that hes an ace pilot." She shot back.

Katie repeating that little fact didn’t move Adam as it seemed she was hoping it would. He stood his ground, refusing to take that thought any further into consideration than he had with Keith. 

"WAS an ace pilot." 

"Adam- Please-."

“… Go home, Katie.” Adam said, feeling his hand begin to shake again but this time from a new anger. “Go be with your mother.”

“How can you be so calm!? That was my family and YOUR fiance in there!” She cried. “You can’t believe that this was all an accident! Takashi wouldn’t make a mistake like this!”

That wasn’t true… Shiro made many mistakes in his life. Mistakes that Adam now regretted excusing for his sake.

“Katie, you don’t know that.” Adam’s voice had gone stiff. “Now go home… I’ve had enough crying children for one day.”

Gruffly, he slammed the door before she could get another word in. Her sobs cut off by the door's resounding WHAM. He could still hear her cries and pleads from the other side, but chose to ignore them in favor of running to the other side of his apartment where he could be as far away from them as possible. The returning shake from earlier had resonated up through his hand and then throughout his person. It shook him harder than anything. Just knowing that he couldn’t help her, and was instead willing to drive another child away when they needed him most-.

“I’m not going through this again…”

This time, he wouldn’t make the mistake of not following his own words.


	2. Hoshi Shirogane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "We don't know how to tell you this Adam... But he is Takashi's son."

As a child, Adam never believed in aliens or miracles. He had been raised by a strict father who didn't even let him believe in Santa Clause, or the tooth fairy. Things that were considered to be staples of childhood were taken from him, and he was always told the truth. Or so he had been raised to believe. His father's word was law, and anything else was nothing but utter bullshit. 'Following your dreams' was an excuse those among the insane used to justify their unrealistic dreams and fuel their useless ambitions in life. 

The exact opposite of how Takashi Shirogane had been brought up. It was the one thing Adam would ever admit to finding unattractive to him. The way he had put so much faith in a rebel for the future of the Garrison- How proudly he said that the boy had true potential as a pilot... When he went as far to ask Adam if, when they married, they could adopt him into their family- It had all sounded like something straight out of a child's fairy tale and it infuriated Adam to no end. Still did. 

Especially now that that same boy had come around to his door, demanding answers for the loss of his 'brother'. As if he expected Adam to pull Shiro out of a damn closet and present him if he asked enough! 

"Takashi is dead." Adam snarled to himself, gripping the handle of his coffee mug tightly. "Why won't anyone just accept that- and leave me alone... I wasn't his keeper."

KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK!!!

Adam felt the mug handle snap and scrape his callused palm before he registered the banging on his door. The hot beverage spilling onto his lap came next, then the sound of three more knocks followed. His heart had gone still, and he felt numb with anger for a moment. The first thought in his mind was that if the person pounding on his door was Keith... That broken handle would be put to good use... 

"Give me a minute- please!" He called, pitching the ceramic bits across his kitchen table and rising from his chair. The burning sensation on his thigh was even present, but he would have to ignore that for now. Six knocks was too many, and regardless of who was there, he was sure they wouldn't appreciate him taking an extra minute to go to his bedroom and change his pants and maybe to whatever burns he had sustained. 

"We don't have time for that, Adam." Commander Iverson's booming tone made Adam's heart go from zero to a thousand beats per minute. "Theres something we need you to see." 

In an instance, Adam was at the door, a red hot blush forming across his face as he faced his leader. 

"S-Sir-" He began, trying to compose himself as quickly as he could. "Forgive me, but-" 

With an embarrassed cough, he made a quick gesture to the current state of his clothing, still noticeably drenched in coffee. The broken mug was also within the Commander's line of sight. The whole set-up was unbecoming of the ace pilot.

"Well, out with it, Adam." Iverson said, "I haven't got all day."

"Sir... I need to change my clothes before we go anywhere... My mug broke this morning an-" Iverson's hand wave silenced Adam faster than any bullet would have. 

"Fix that temper of yours while you're changing your pants... We don't have enough ceramic for you to keep breaking." Iverson scoffed, turning sharply and heading off down the hall. "I will meet you in the infirmary... Prepare yourself, boy." 

"Sir?" 

By then, Iverson had already disappeared down the hall. So with a loud sigh, Adam slammed the door to his apartment shut and hurried off to his bedroom. His face was burning still, hurting him worse than the pain in his legs did. Still, he would have to worry about that later on. When your commander calls on you, theres little time to focus on much else... 

"Except making that..." Adam laughed bitterly, tugging off his soiled pants and catching sight of any ugly pink burn forming on his thigh. "... I need to take a couple sick days after this... Just long enough to sort things out." 

For a moment, he thought to what Takashi would say if he were standing there right now. Perhaps he would give Adam a stern lecture on how poorly he was treating Keith, or how he needed to relax every one in a while. Maybe he would be helping Adam move his stuff out of their once shared living space. Adopt Keith himself, and start his life over without Adam. Maybe then people wouldn't think Adam went off the deep end for talking outloud. 

... Had Adam's father still been around, he would have most likely beaten his son for wasting time thinking on such nonsense. He never did approve of Takashi, but he wouldn't stand for how the dead man had caused his son to act. Spilling hot coffee on your lap and stuttering to your commanding officer just to ignore a command to talk to someone who wasn't there- Adam could just see his father's angered expression now. 

"All of that is bullshit... They're all gone." He said, turning to look over his shoulder at the spot where he had imagined Takashi being, completely unsurpised but a little disappointed when he saw that no one was there. "... I need to remember to get rid of his things when I get back home..." 

With another loud sigh, Adam tossed his old pants in the laundry hamper and pulled out a new pair, taking a few seconds to note his ex's own which were hung up besides his. They were all pressed a little too crisply for something Takashi would have worn, but that wasn't something he was too concerned about. It took him two seconds too long to pull on his new pair though, and he made up for it by running down the hall in the direction of the infirmary. 

When he arrived, he found Iverson waiting for him. The older man looked oddly solemn, almost concerned. For who or what, Adam didn't know quite yet. Taking a deep breath, he cautiously slowed his run back down to a walk and stopped just a foot away from the Commander. The man practically winced when Adam stopped. It made him nervous. 

"Son... What you're about to see and hear is going to be a bit of a shock." Iverson began, speaking slowly and clearly taking his time in picking his words. 

"I can take whatever it is you are going to show me." Adam assured him, his voice firm to make up for his earlier tone. 

"If you're sure... I'm just telling you now- I'm not going to blame you if you can't." Iverson said, pushing the infirmary door open for Adam. 

On shaky legs, the Ace pilot began the walk into the room. The first thing that hit him was the smell of chemicals and cleaner. That, coupled with his hammering heart, was almost enough to make him feel sick. There was no turning back at this point, as evident by the sound of the slamming door behind him and Iverson's heavy steps echoing after his own. 

"Hes right behind that curtain." The older man said, his tone unreadable. 

"He-" For a moment, Takashi's kind smile and loving eyes flashed behind Adam's eyes, but it vanished just as quickly as it had come on. He knew better than to hope for that much... The dead don't return that easily. Especially when their name has been jinxed as much as Takashi's had been. Adam knew that if there was a God out there at all, it wouldn't be a cruel enough God to do that to him. 

Pulling back the curtain, Adam found nothing but dark, as his eyes had flown closed out of what he figured was sudden fear... Something he hadn't felt in a very long time.

"Adam...?" Iverson's voice chased that fear away in a hurry. 

"I'm fine... Just- Give me a minute and I'll look." 

Slowly, he pried his lids apart and glanced down at a small figure on the bed. A child, as thin as a rail with a mess of dark black hair that was stuck to his forehead by a thin sheen of sweat. The boy was no older than five- maybe, but that wasn't what stood out to Adam... His eyes were deep but loving, and his smile when he saw his visitor... It was all so familiar to him. 

"Adam, we don't know how to tell you this... But this boy- He is Takashi's son..." Iverson began. "H-his son!?" Adam exclaimed, his voice raising to an almost embarrassing octave. "Adam." Iverson's voice dropped to a low growl. "We don't know how to tell you that this is Takashi's son... In fact, we can't tell anyone." "Sir, in all respect, I'm sure no one would be alarmed finding out that my ex has a bastard son with some woman-" Adam sneered, stopping only when he caught sight of Iverson's face. The man face told Adam that this assumption was far from the truth. "Adam... Can you understand now?" Iverson said. Adam didn't answer. One moment he was in the infirmary, the next he was falling quickly to the floor, with the whole world going dark around him as he did. As dark as the child's eyes... Dark as Takashi's once were... And as dark as his soul was turning as the situation unfolded so rapidly. 


	3. The Man in the Woods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For the first time since he was a child, Adam dreams.

_There was no way lightning would strike him a third time…_

_“Hoshi, this is your father, Shiro.”_

_For so many years, he had waited to say that. So many nights after acquiring permission from the Garrison to keep the child- their child, home to raise… It almost seemed impossible. Space had taken his love away from him, kept him away for the longest time and yet miraculously out of a billion to one chance, managed to send Adam HIS child…_

_It all seemed impossible the first time. He was almost sure that lightning wasn’t going to strike him again by sending Shiro himself down to him again…_

_Yet somehow he was granted that much. For now the man of the God damn hour stood before him-_

_And it set him on edge. It took every ounce of Adam’s restraint not to knock Shiro’s hand away as it came up to brush their son’s soft hair. To put as much distance between the two as he could-_

_“Hoshi… Hello.” Shiro greeted the child kindly. “My name is Takashi Shirogane…”_

_Adam felt his jaw set into place at Shiro’s tone… It was too kurt and formal for someone meeting the child they didn’t know they had… A child that their ex had been raising on their own for years. It didn’t feel right._

_“He know who you are.” Adam said stiffly. “He’s known since he was born-”_

_“Adam.” Shiro visibly flinched._

_“The DNA strands and chemical functions of his brain were 98% yours.” Adam felt his grip on Hoshi tighten. “If not for my 2% then he’d be a perfect clone of you.”_

_“Adam!” Shiro repeated, this time with a sterner tone that told Adam to back down. “I know you’re mad at me and I don’t blame you- heck, be furious with me… But I have a right to OUR son just the same that you do.”_

_Meanwhile, Hoshi had bowed his head submissively, a gesture Adam new meaning that the boy was frightened or confused. He was polite enough not to interrupt the two to demand an explanation. Adam had raised him that way, after all._

_Adjusting both his glasses and the boy, Adam took that chance to gather himself._

_“Takashi… I didn’t call you over here to stay for long… I just wanted Hoshi to get to see you again.” Adam said, all but shoving the boy into Shiro’s arms. “I’m not keeping him from you, but just know that things are different now and I only trust you as far as I can throw you.”_

_“Which can mean to the edge of space and back.” Shiro shot back. “Seriously, Adam? I’m back from the dead- we have a blessing now and you’re still on about what happened before the mission!?”_

_Adam bowed his head in a similar fashion to Hoshi. He was holding his tongue in a desperate attempt to not say the wrong thing and drive Takashi away once more. Even while unsure of things- he didn’t want to chase Shiro away again just yet._

_“This isn’t about the mission anymore.” Adam started, “From the moment they announced something had happened- I was over it. I was worried sick about your idiot ass! Our Garrison said you were dead but something felt so off about that that I lost sleep over it, until one day this child comes from space that just so happens to share our DNA!? Light years were between us and yet a little piece of you came back to me-”_

_In am instance Adam was pulled into a tight hug by Shiro, Hoshi squished in between the two. It felt nostalgic of the hugs they would share whenever they would fight back then. Only- Only this time it didn’t have the same effect on Adam. He didn’t feel his anger melt away, rather he felt it intensify to the point that he was shaking._

_“I’m sorry, Adam…” Shiro muttered, stroking a hand through his ex’s hair. “I wasn’t there for you… But if the universe was kind enough to give you hope that I was alive- and hope for our future… I can’t say that I can regret my choices from back then.”_

_“Our future…” Adam scoffed. “No… Takashi, when this is all over… I never want to see you again…”_

_“Adam-”_

_“Hoshi and I have a place out in the suburbs that we will be moving into… Don’t follow us.” Adam’s voice was stern. “You may be 98% of him, but I’ve raised him as my own for so damn long- I wanted him to get to see you one last time.”_

_“Why, Adam?” Shiro’s earlier tone dropped suddenly. “So you can say to everyone that you’re such a great father and how I’m an irrational and irresponsible piece of shit for wanting to take control of my life despite my illness!? That you’d rather be with a HEALTHY copy of me that you can control better?”_

_Adam growled low in his throat, about to connect a blow to Shiro’s jaw before remembering the child still wrapped in a mechanical arm. Still, the pain swelling in his chest was too much for him to bare and he needed to release it somehow._

_“I DON’T WANT HIM TO BE LIKE YOU!” His body felt like it weighed a ton suddenly, and he quickly realized that he had tears in his eyes. “Takashi… I already lost you… I can’t lose Hoshi…”_

_A silence hung between the two, so heavy and thick that Adam was sure it would kill him. His dark eyes shifted to Hoshi, who was clinging to Shiro’s shirt like a lifeline. It hurt him to think of Hoshi leaving him- even more so at the thought of it being because of Shiro- He just knew in his heart that his choices were the right ones to make._

_Suddenly, Shiro spoke up, but this time it was not to Adam._

_“It is very nice to meet you, Hoshi.” Shiro said, cupping the child’s small face. “Have you been good for your father?”_

_“Yes sir.” Hoshi replied, smiling just a little. “My name is Hoshi Shirogane.”_

_“I know that.” Shiro smiled, adjusting the child in his arms so he could seemingly look at his face better. “I’m glad I got to meet you.”_

_As they talked, Adam found himself in the attached kitchen of his apartment. His hands were shaking violently as he went to the coffee pot and tried to make a fresh pot for- whomever would drink it. Certainly not him, as he hated the stuff, but- Shiro always liked it…_

_“No… It’s a billion to one chance that I’d ever fall in love with him again.” He said out loud ._

_Undoubtedly_ _, Shiro must have felt the same. Light years of traveling could really change a person. They were over, and nothing would bring them back to one another- Nothing could._

_There was no way lightning would strike him a third time…_

* * *

Adam awoke with a start, sweat pooling around his temples as he fought to catch his breath. Based on how dark the room was, it was night time- and based on how unfamiliar it was, he also deduced that he was not in his own room. A quick analysis of his surroundings was all he needed to conclude that he was still in the medical wing of the Garrison, this time set up in a spare cot. For the second time in his life, Adam felt a red hot blush creep up his face as he remembered what had happened the last time he had his eyes open... 

"Heh... Fainting in front of my commanding officer... My father would have killed me." He muttered bitterly. 

Dark eyes casted from the corner of the room, over to the cot besides him. Despite being unable to see that far in the dark, Adam's instincts told him that he was looking at the boy he had just met. He could practically feel Takashi's warmth in the boy's eyes, as they peered at him... That or the boy was sleeping, it was hard to tell. 

"Hoshi." His ears registered the name mere seconds after he spoke it, his tongue having worked faster than his brain ever since he woke up. 

"Is that me?" A little voice asked in the dark. "Am I Hoshi?"

"You don't know?" Adam replied, sitting up a little straighter. 

"No... Theres a lot I don't know." The voice said. 

"... You and I are in the same boat then." Adam scoffed, rubbing his fingers through his damp hair. "I have no idea whats happening... I'm hoping this is all just a dream." 

"...You're in luck then..."

Confusion ran over Adam briefly, as his eyes finally adjusted to the darkness of the room- and all he found was soft stars glittering in the shadows where Hoshi- or rather the boy should have been. 

"... I haven't woken up yet, have I?" Adam mused, shaking his head slowly. "I don't do this often- I suppose I just don't know how to come out from one of these things..."

"Sleep a little longer then. You've got a big meeting when you wake up." The voice had changed, morphing from what he thought was the boy's into his own, tired and embarrassed one. "You'll be meeting Hoshi for the first time- and he'll be meeting himself."

"... I don't recite when I'm speaking." Adam huffed, laying back down on the imaginary cot. 

"You don't dream often either." 

"A lot of impossible things are happening today... Lets just hope this isn't the least of it..."

"... Goodnight, Adam."

"Goodnight, Hoshi."

* * *

 

 


End file.
